See the truth.
Heal your wounds.
Reclaim yourself.

Choose YOU! isn’t a quick fix or another info dump about narcissists.
It’s an ongoing, guided journey to help you:

✨ Spot the truth behind manipulation
✨ Heal the wounds that keep you stuck
✨ Rebuild your self-worth and peace - one intentional choice at a time

Why Subscribe?

Because recovery from psychological abuse & dysfunctional conditioning isn’t linear - and real healing won’t come from a single insight, book, or workshop.

Abuse and dysfunctional conditioning rewire your mind, turning damaging self-beliefs into automatic instincts that shape how you see yourself and move through the world.

Without intentionally creating new, healthy thoughts - and consciously practicing them, every day - you stay emotionally entangled in the cycle.

It’s why I created this space: so you can practice Choosing YOU, every day.

What’s Choose YOU! Pocket Coaching?

Unlike private coaching calls or self-paced online courses you do alone, Pocket Coaching is an ongoing journey out of emotional entanglement that I walk with you.

Depending on your subscription tier, you’ll get:

✅ Science-backed info on narcissism, trauma, and recovery
✅ Skills to spot, remove & replace distorted beliefs that keep you stuck
✅ A space to ask your most pressing questions and get grounded answers
✅ Pages from my healing journal documenting what I did to cope, process, and move forward
✅ Conscious, daily self-work & reprogramming tasks - instead of short-lived breakthroughs or one-off workshops
✅ No demons. No ghost stories. Just clear psychology and grounded facts.

Everything comes straight to your email, Substack website, or the free app - no appointments needed.

Meet Carmen

Hi, I’m Carmen Sakurai - BS Psy, Certified Trauma-Informed Master Life Coach… and survivor.

I’m trained & certified in multiple evidence-based modalities, including CBT, DBT, REBT, and Mental & Behavioral Health Studies focusing on stress management, burnout prevention, depression, and suicide/violent behavior.

So with over 20 years of study, training, and certifications, you’d think I’d be immune to manipulation and abuse.

Nope.

I’ve lived the crazy-making, made excuses for people who disregarded my feelings, and found myself repeating the same insanity inducing, heart breaking cycles I swore I’d never return to.

I’ve sat in darkness so heavy, I reached for the National Lifeline.

⚡I know this isn’t just a bad breakup you can “move on” from.
⚡I know not all mothers are wired to love their children
⚡I know what it feels like to “live” just trying to survive each day
⚡I know hopelessness so deep, you wonder if giving up would hurt less

When Complex PTSD symptoms and Borderline Personality traits showed up, my first thought?

Are you kidding me? I’m a single mom raising my son and running a business alone - I don’t have time for this!

So I made a deal with myself:
Just 24 hours of noticing my automatic thoughts and consciously changing the damaging ones.

Then another 24.
Then another.

Choice by choice, the self-loathing, emptiness, fear of abandonment, and daily flashbacks began to quiet.

Choosing me went from being a practice… to reflex.

Now, I live flashback and trigger-free, protect my peace without apology, and respect who I’ve become. Effortlessly.

And now?

I’m here to help you → Choose YOU.

DISCLAIMER

I am not a licensed therapist. Everything I share comes from the perspective of a survivor - for informational and educational purposes only. This is not a substitute for professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of a qualified mental health professional for your specific situation.

Keeping Choose YOU! Sustainable

Choose YOU! isn’t just a project - it’s my mission, and my full-time work.
Every resource, update, and insight here is built to help survivors see the truth, heal deeply, and reclaim their lives.

To keep this space growing and accessible, I offer free, paid, and advocate memberships - each designed to give you real, ongoing support wherever you are in your journey. ❤️

✅ FREE Subscribers

Get empowering, research‑based tools every week to guide your healing journey

🎙 The Choose YOU! Podcast
Think of this as weekly “audio coaching” - where we cover essential truths about narcissistic abuse recovery, bust myths that keep survivors stuck, and answer your real questions.

📝 Weekly Check‑In
A deeper dive into each episode: the science behind it, why it matters for your breakthrough, and how to apply it to your daily life.

📄 Free Guides
Introductory, easy‑to‑understand resources to help you begin untangling the damage and reclaiming your sense of self.

🌱 PAID Subscribers

$10/month - the full Choose YOU! Pocket Coaching experience

🧩 The CY! Complete Healing Ecosystem
A living, growing resource to help you understand what happened, spot manipulation, heal deeply, and rebuild your life.

Each week, you’ll get a new Healing Framework - with practical, step‑by‑step support, like:

• Case Studies from real clients: what we uncovered and how they healed

• Pattern Adjustment Homework - remove & replace distorted beliefs

• My Healing Journal - pages from my actual journal documenting what I did to cope, process, and move forward (plus steps you can try)

• FAQs - so you’re never left with loose ends

Plus, exclusive tools & community support:

• Virtual Q&A - ask questions, get validation, and clarify your next steps

• Off the Record - behind the scenes audios & videos where I share my observations, mistakes & assumptions during my own recovery.

• SOS Cards - to help when you’re feeling stuck, anxious, or overwhelmed

• “Framework in Practice” thread - where I share how I applied one of the frameworks, what happened, and invite your wins & reflections

• 50% off “Carmen vs. the Bullsh*t” - where we role-play, draft, and train new self-protective instincts (like enforcing your boundaries and rooting yourself in truth) together - so you can move with confidence!
  

🖤 ADVOCATE (Founding) members:

$200/year - for those ready to go deeper & help spread awareness

You get everything above, plus:

📺 Monthly Livestreams - where we hang out, get your questions answered, and talk about whatever is on your mind.

📞 50‑Minute 1:1 Coaching Call for $50 (once a month, non‑cumulative)
(Current rate $197/hour.) I block out time exclusively for Advocates.

🛠 Virtual Workshops - I host throughout the year (I’m aiming for 3x a year)

❤️ Part of your subscription funds free memberships for survivors in financial need. Together, we make healing accessible.

Why are Comments Open to Paid Members Only?

Choose YOU! Pocket Coaching is designed to be a truly safe space.

It takes courage to start healing from narcissistic or emotionally abusive relationships.

Admitting something wasn’t right - in your family, your romantic relationship, or even your oldest friendship - is hard enough.

Stepping up and asking for help? That’s a BIG DEAL.

That’s why it’s essential to create a space where you can share, process, and grow without added grief, trolling, or interference.

Because here’s the reality:

Some people - intentionally or not - invalidate, minimize, or gaslight survivors who speak up about their experiences.

That’s not OK.

You’ve been silenced long enough.

Now is your time to CHOOSE YOU: your peace, your healing, and a life where you feel genuinely safe and seen.

While the podcast and weekly check-ins stay free and public, the paywalled comments and chats keep our community conversations private, protected, and focused on your growth.

Whichever Level You Choose…

Together, we’ll throw everything I’ve got at what tried to keep you small:

✨ My education in personality disorders
✨ My training in human behavior
✨ And most importantly — the raw truth I earned as a survivor

You’ll learn to stop shrinking, start seeing clearly, and Choose YOU!

I believe you.
You’re NOT alone.

FAQ

Q. What’s the difference between “Choose YOU!” and “Carmen vs. the Bullsh*t”?

A. Choose YOU! is your structured, science-backed roadmap: psychology, recovery frameworks, and step-by-step guides to heal from narcissistic abuse.

Carmen vs. the Bullsht* is the practice space: raw, real, messy, and community-driven, where we role-play, draft, vent, and actually train new self-protective instincts together.